A recent study by a sociologist at the University of Notre Dame found that the oft-told story of rich men marrying disproportionately attractive women is, well, just a story. Using a nationally representative sample, the researcher found that examples of this are fairly rare—and widely overblown. In fact, the strongest force in partner selection is similarity in education, race, religion and looks. In reality, women don’t tend to marry for money, and successful men often end up with successful women.

MORE: The Real Reason You’re Attracted to Him