Hopefully we’ve all grown up a little in the two-plus years since MTV’s “Jersey Shore” went off the air. Ronnie and Sammi broke up after five years of reality show-worthy ups and downs. Pauly D has become one of the world’s highest paid DJs. (I cut my hair and got a cat.) But if you really want to feel old, I have news for you: Snooki has two children. Nicole (also, she goes by Nicole now) may have grown up, but she still knows how to use her life as job fodder. Post-“Jersey Shore,” Nicole’s done four seasons on “Snooki and Jwoww,” started her own fashion line and podcast, and has her eye on a talk show with husband Jionni LaValle.
YouBeauty: Is this that bathroom spray?
Nicole “Snooki” Polizzi : It’s Poopourri. So if you have to go poop, you spray three spritzes in the toilet and you won’t smell it.
And you carry it around with you?
Yeah, because if I have to go poop somewhere…
That’s the smartest thing I ever heard.
You never know how big a dump is gonna be.
Ok, so. Tell me about your book, Baby Bumps. It comes out in paperback today. The book describes your “shocking encounter with pregnancy” when you were 24. So what happened when you found out you were pregnant?
Well, I wrote this when it was my first pregnancy so obviously I was scared shitless. I knew I wanted to write a book. I had a journal, and I just wrote everything down with my stories and how I felt. It’s scary. You don’t know what’s going to happen to your body. And your body changes. And you can’t stop it. It’s not like you’re gaining weight and you could go lose it. You’re lending your body to a little alien.
And you just didn’t feel ready at the time?
Well we didn’t plan it, but once we found out that we were pregnant we never thought, you know, let’s not have him. So I had to just suck it up and deal with it.
You said your lifestyle changed when you got pregnant. Of course it would for anyone, especially at 24. Do you feel like it wouldn’t have changed if it wasn’t for motherhood?
Probably not. I probably would still want to party and drink, so I think everything happens for a reason. It was getting a little crazy with the drinking. I would go to Vegas all the time and drink and me and Jionni would always go out and drink and we would just fight and eventually we would probably have broken up. I think this was supposed to happen, to make us a better couple. To make me a better person. Everything happens for a reason.
That’s interesting because I feel like babies can really rip a couple apart if they’re not ready for it. That’s great that it did the opposite.
They do both, I think. For us, it definitely just made us grow up as a couple and as individuals. We would fight over the dumbest stuff when we were drunk. So stupid.
So how do you guys handle parenting? What’s your parenting strategy?
He usually takes Lorenzo. Now that we have two, it’s a game changer. I’m usually with the baby [Giovanna] because I’m breastfeeding her. So she’s attached to my nipple – literally. And Jionni’s with Lorenzo. So we don’t really have alone time together. We’re trying to work on that, where we have dates once a week, or once a month at least. As of right now we’re just full-time parents.
Between everything that you do – writing, the reality show, your fashion line – is there one that you’re looking to pursue more?
I definitely love TV. That’s what started everything. I love doing reality. I want to get into hosting. Maybe do some behind-the-scenes stuff with producing but I definitely want to do more TV. Me and Jionni still want to work together, so we’re trying to figure out what we want to do next, if we want to do reality or a talk show. As far as our kids on TV, we don’t want that.
A talk show would be great.
I would love a talk show. That’d be so fun. Just talk about anything.
I could see like an Andy Cohen-esque “Watch What Happens Live.”
Yeah, but better.
Tell me a little bit about the fashion line too.
Nicole: It’s called Snooki Love. Right now, it’s more comfortwear. Just comfortable stuff. I wanted to do more dressy type, going out stuff, and a little bit more expensive but not too expensive. It’s going to be called SLNP: Snooki Love by Nicole Polizzi. It’s only online right now. I’m trying to get it into stores but it’s really hard. I never knew how hard it was. You get it through these meetings and they have to approve all your stuff but I’m at least selling online.
I’ve heard that. But shopping online is easier now anyway!
Yeah, I do online shopping.
Do you want to write more?
This is my fourth book. I had A Shore Thing, Gorilla Beach, Confessions of a Guidette and now Baby Bumps. The others are fictional, but the number one thing about this book is I tell the truth about pregnancy. A lot of pregnancy books do not tell you the truth. They just take you through the guidelines: “This month you’re gonna feel this way, you should eat this.” They don’t tell you exactly what’s going to happen to you through your pregnancy. I tell it straight how it is. I just wanted it to be a relatable book because when I was pregnant, I needed somebody to tell me they were feeling the same way as me, like I wasn’t crazy. But I didn’t have that. I wanted to write something so that other ladies can be like “ok I’m not crazy.”
Another thing the book talks about is dealing with constant scrutiny of your body.
Well, I was anorexic before. In high school, it was senior year. I was a cheerleader and all the little freshman girls were coming up and they were like sticks they were like fifty pounds. I was scared I was going to lose my spot as a flier. So I was like fuck this, I’m not eating. So I was anorexic for like three months. Once cheerleading was over, I just got over it. My nurse was like “You’re gonna die.” It scared the shit out of me, and I started eating again.
Baby weight is obviously very different, but was it hard to deal with at all?
Not really because I was already fat from drinking. I feel like the anorexic stage was just short-lived, thank God, because it was so scary. I fluctuated with my weight from being so thin in high school to gaining so much on “Jersey Shore” and drinking. Now I’m at a stage where I’m healthy. I’m working out, I’m eating well, and I’ve never been this healthy in my life.
Have you stopped drinking entirely? Is that something you feel like you needed to do?
Well, on the show that was all we did. Drinks. It was kind of like our job to party. When it ended I was, like, thank God, because I can’t drink anymore. It was a relief.
Kourtney Kardashian just Instagrammed this picture of her in Vegas. She was working a party and afterwards she went home and had to pump.
I saw that!
It seemed like such a great mix of the two things. This is her job, she’s paid to party, but then she goes home and she’s a mom. I have a lot of respect for that.
Yep, she had to pump and dump. I do that if I have a glass of wine or two. I have to pump and dump. You don’t want to get your baby drunk.
Is that still part of your job, doing party gigs?
I haven’t done that in about two years. I haven’t done a club appearance in so long. I would love to because that would be my Mommy Night Out and I would also get paid. I have to pay for my house, and my bills, and my kids. I would like to get back into that — but not the cheap parties I used to go to and just get drunk and be stupid.
It has to be hard to figure out what to say no to.
Yeah, exactly. I would like to try to do some appearances. And a talk show.
This interview has been condensed and edited.
Baby Bumps: From Party Girl to Proud Mama and All the Messy Milestones Along the Way by Nicole Polizzia is for sale now.