New research shows that when it comes to sex, women really have a mind of their own. There are many different ways each women can experience pleasure, and each way lights up your brain like a Christmas tree!
(Yeah, just like your teenage boyfriends, it seems like the researchers were a little confused as to what turns a gal on.)
But, they scientifically proved what you’ve been telling your sexual partners all along, because:
1. There’s a sexy connection between your nipples and your vagina. When your breasts are caressed, that touch also sends a signal downtown.
2. All those sweet spots between a woman’s legs, the vagina, clitoris, and cervix, each turn on a different sexy section of the brain.
3. The clitoris signals the same part of the brain in women as the penis does in men.
These amazing findings, published in The Journal Of Sexual Medicine, have clearly shown there is more than one way for a woman to experience pure ecstasy…. Doesn’t that make you want to try them all?!
To get into the sexual groove, marriage counselor Rachel Sussman suggests focusing on one hot spot at a time, as the women in the study did. (Unlike the office, you shouldn’t try to multi-task in the sack.)
Learning all the possibilities of what you like in bed doesn’t require you to rely on a partner, nor does it even have to happen between the sheets.
Sussman argues that so much of intercourse is focused on pleasing our partner. The ladies who participated in the study managed their own bliss exploration. So, we gals have take matters into our own hands, literally. Or, perhaps even pick up a battery operated boyfriend you have complete control over—a vibrator.
When it comes to learning what makes we ladies orgasm, “It’s a matter of getting comfortable touching yourself,” Sussman says. “As women get older they become more curious about their bodies and their sexual response and they get more comfortable with themselves.” In fact, some have argued that sex really starts getting good after 40. (Feel free to use that statistic to justify your cougar lifestyle.)
But why get hung up on age? Whether you’re new to sex or have been doing it for years, if you’re struggling to find the joy of sex, a good place to start feeling comfortable with your body what learning what it can do is in yoga class. Sussman explains: “It’s just a great way to slow our brains down, slow yourself down, and just figure out what is it about your body that can give you the most pleasure.” Hey, there’s got to be a reason it’s been popular for roughly five thousand years!
Once you know your own body you’re ready to share it with your partner. To garnish the same mind blowing effects as the study, Sussman suggests showing the way, exactly like the research did, by focusing on one part at a time and letting the sexy anticipation build as you’re lavished with attention.
She views this exploratory touching as a kind of naughty meditation. Sussman has her couple clients start with this first homework assignment: “Have her be naked and then, very gently, touch her in different parts of her body.”
And every body is different. Much like the new study has shown, Sussman admits that she has seen firsthand that variety truly is the spice of life. “I get all sorts of interesting responses, even something like when you rub me on this part of my I arm I feel tingling in my vagina,” she said. “People will tell you rubbing different parts of your body often times produces sensations that they weren’t expecting.”
However, while sex is a great stress reliever, it can also cause plenty of performance anxiety, and not just for men. While the physical signs might not be as obvious for women as they are for guys, if you’re trying hard and it’s not working, you’ve got to let it go. “Frustration and having good sex don’t go hand in hand,” Mrs. Sussman points out.
So, take your sweet time, focus the attention on indulging one hot spot before skipping off to another, and relax. As this study has proven, if you’re a woman, you’re on more than one path to pleasure.