What do you think about swinging?

(26 replies)

by Jenichael

10 months ago

Viewed 3037 times

Me and my fiance have tossed around the idea, and am willing to maybe try to have a woman come into our relationship for both of us. The only thing is I have no desire to have a man in our relationship. And no I am not gay or bisexual. But interested in making my man happy. We havn't done it yet, but am curious about thoughts about it. Any advise?

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mikessugar replied 10 months ago:

I dont think its a good idea. I think it gives him the idea that ur ok with him sleeping with another woman and he may just keep doing it. What if him and that other women have great chemistry. How u gonna feel if he leaves u for her. Just putting that out there. I think u should do spontanious things xample, rent a hotel, meet up there @ different times and pretend its a rondaivou (spelt wong w.e.). by some nw toys, buy an erotic game from the love shop. But never bring someone else into ur bedroom. That's my advice. Good luck

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lovey53 replied 10 months ago:

I have to agree with the comment before. Never bring another woman or man into your bedroom.

All it does is open a gateway to other problems later in the relationship.

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Mamabear12 replied 10 months ago:

My husband and I have been swinging for about 6 years now. Our relationship has grown emensely! It in no way made our relationship more difficult, if anything out bond for eachother has grown! Swinging is not for everyone and if it is a territory you will be venturing into there has to be rules. My husband and I have made some really great friends that we will have a lifetime!

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EnigmaMCMLXIV replied 10 months ago:

I would not consider it personally because of the committed relationship my partner and I have. I would think if you are engaged to this man that he is happy. Another consideration is STD's you don't know where the other person has been.

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jermsmom replied 10 months ago:

I think you need to ask yourself why you are willing to do this. Are you willing because you fear that if you don't he will lose interest and look elsewhere? Are you willing because you find the idea exciting? The fact that you are questioning it on a forum suggests that you may have doubts. I would urge you to sit still and listen, really listen, to that small inner voice inside you. Don't think about him - think only about yourself for a few minutes. Is this what you really want? Do you foresee a long and healthy future for the two of you if you do go through with this - or is it opening up the door to distrust and jealousy? Finally, ask yourself honestly if you would respect both him AND yourself if you go into this situation.

Most of all, I wish you well, but I do hope you consider what your inner voice is telling you.

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Jill789 replied 10 months ago:

Another woman in your bed can only mean trouble. Soon your husband might start thinking "hey, other women is a great idea" and next thing you know he's swinging it all over town - with or without you.

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PantyhoseQueen replied 10 months ago:

No good, what do YOU get out of it other than perhaps jealousy? Either it's you two, or the highway. There are tons of other ways to spice things up. Just out of curiosity - if you said "well, no, but how about we bring another man into bed?" I bet his hair would stand straight up! lol No good end came come from this - love each other, please each other, but just the two of you, or eventaully it will be just the one of you, hunny. I know. Been there.

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angstandvexed replied 10 months ago:

Where I'm not against the idea of swinging; I'm not sure if its right for you. You said that you were willing to do it for you fiance; but that you weren't really into it yourself. Just be careful, doing something for him is great; but can lead to alot of problems if your not equally into it.

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Pet replied 10 months ago:

It is fun with a friend (with benefits) A long term relationship, that is loving, I am not too sure.

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puchita88 replied 10 months ago:

NO WAY JOSE, I KNOW IS ALWAYS THE MAIN IDEA YOU HEAR MAN TALKING ABOUT IT. BUT IS NOT A NICE THING TO DO TO HAVE YOUR MAN TOUCHING YOU AND HER AT THE SAME TIME. I THINK IS KIND OF GROSS.

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pinkrosepetal01 replied 10 months ago:

bad idea, in my opinion it will break your heart and ruin your relationship just for momentary lust.

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GrowingUp replied 9 months ago:

To swing takes a lot of confidence. If you do it make sure it's something that you want to do, not just for him. Make sure that you trust him and that he trust you. He could have another woman without you so if he wants to make you apart of it, kinda special, Men and women cheat all the time and spouses or significant others stay in the relationship. It''s not for everyone, but if it works for you both, do it.

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V3r0n1ca replied 9 months ago:

If your man is thinking of adding another woman to the relationship then he doesn't love you enough, YOU should be all he needs. Dont stoop yourself to that level. How dare he even suggest it? Move on girl.

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outdoor replied 8 months ago:

Its not for everyone but some people finding it amazing and liberating..dont' let other peoples standards and judgements limit you.

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tlkct replied 8 months ago:

Lets just say my best friend was a swinger for about a month.....her and her husband our now going thru a divorce.

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Jenichael replied 8 months ago:

I thank everyone for your advise, He and I have decided that it was not worth loosing our relationship over. Not saying that it won't maybe come up on conversation again, just not for us right now. Have met a couple of people that do live that lifestyle and they seem great, and very secure in what they have. But I'm just not sure that is is right for us. But once again thank all of you for your responces.

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cuckholddon replied 7 months ago:

It works for lots of folks-BUT

It depends on if you two comunicate enough& deep enough--you BOTH are able to seporate Love& sex(some can't) What about jellousy--Either you or him-can't have that!

You two Do need to set ground rules!

My wife& I have had an open relationship for over 20yrs & we are still madly in love!

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Hot herpes here replied 6 months ago:

I like the idea of catching a fresh hot case of herpes from another swinger! The danger makes the sex SO much hotter. And watching my spouse gettin' jiggy with a relative stranger fills me with confidence.

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LWJR replied 6 months ago:

Sicko's. Get some help.

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vickibuh70 replied 5 months ago:

I JEST THINK IT NOT A GOOD THING, PLUS THE BAD FEELING THAT MAY COME UP LATER.

I WOULD REALLY THINK HARD ABOUT IT.

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Kendrick7376 replied 5 months ago:

To each their own, But don't knock it until you tried it. You should talk about it with each other at length. What kind of opened our eyes is meeting a swinging couple on vacation and talking with them about it. We didn't do anything with them as we didn't have any interest at that time. When our vacation was over we just kept talking about it and when our next vacation together came up we decided to "see" what was out there. I think though both have to have a desire to do it. if 1 does and the other doesn't I don't think it will work. That is where talking at length and maybe walking through a situation would help. It does make you nervous and excited but if you can get past that it is actually quite fun

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sivolc replied 5 months ago:

Sure: Do it. Have lots of fun..and when your relationship inevitably is ruined, remember that nothing on earth can put it back together. Merry Xmas

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jesusisallright replied 5 months ago:

I think anything outside of marriage is from the pits of hell, and will drag you down with it. We were not designed like dogs, or the morals of a alley cat, it was designed for a life time relationship, why chance hiv or something, and the sad part of it you still have to face God even if it is accepted down here

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agsb replied 5 months ago:

I have been swing for several years and STD's is overblown because swingers are very selective and get to know their partners to a far greater extend than the general populace. I know I did. They are generally workalcolics who spend most of the time working. I have met people who found their life-partner at a swing party.

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Twons replied 5 months ago:

You're playing with dynamite; maybe it blows up, maybe it doesn't, but either way there's no going back and you're relationship will never be the same. Understanding you are engaged all, I would have to say that just by you asking the question, you probably have a good amount of personal growth to do before you should consider yourself as "settled down" with a long term partner.

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marylandlady123 replied 28 days ago:
First you need 2 ask these questions
- Does he think I cant give him what he needs?
- Do you feel comfortable with swinging?
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