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Building Confidence


7 replies
User_6055
theOlive

about 3 years ago

A good number of guys and just people in general find me attractive, why I have no idea. I dont find myself as attractive as others do as a result of a major lack of self confidence and insecurities from childhood that carried into my adult life. How do I build up my self confidence to view myself as others do?
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    mgrace
    about 3 years ago
    Sit down and make a list of FIVE things you like about yourself, little or big....physical or non-physical. Ex: I like how straight my teeth are, or I like how I organized I am. Grow it from there. Its okay to feel a little selfish about yourself, and to look in the mirror and say, "ya i do friggin rock!"
  • Matthew
    Matthew D. Della Porta, Ph.D. Happiness Expert
    about 3 years ago
    It's common to struggle with self-esteem. An effective way to address this issue is through the use of positive affirmations. This involves saying statements that counteract any negative thinking that you normally do. Here are a few example affirmations, but feel free to come up with your own: 1) I am beautiful. 2) I am worthy of love. 3) I am grateful for my [choose any attractive feature that you have]. Even if you don't believe them, practice saying them. Write them down on index cards and post them somewhere where you'll see them. Say them out loud to yourself at least three times a week, with conviction. Fake it until you make it! :) This technique may seem silly at first but it's important to recognize that a lack of self-esteem is usually sustained by lots of negative thinking. These negative, self-defeating thoughts need to be countered with positive thoughts, which come from the positive affirmations. Good luck!
  • User_33502
    kaitlin07
    almost 3 years ago
    It's the same for me. I've realized though that you just have to know you have perfections and imperfections just like everybody else, and embrace that.
  • User_152149
    cellomaster
    over 2 years ago
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    queen556
    over 2 years ago
    GO WITH IT...YOU ARE NOT A KID ANYMORE...LOSE THE INSECURITIES (I KNOW EASIER SAID THAN DONE) BUT YOU WILL MISS A LOT IN LIFE WORRING ABOUT BEING INSECURE..I FOUND MYSELF SITTING HOME ALONE BECAUSE I COULDN'T FIND ANYONE TO DO THINGS WITH ME, THEN I THOUGHT, WHY AM I WAITING...NOW I GO EVERYWHERE I WANT TO GO, IF IT IS BY MYSELF SO BE IT, THERE ARE SO MANY PEOPLE OUT THERE TO MEET & TALK TO. YOU HAVE MEN THAT THINK YOU ARE ATTRACTIVE...RELISH IT.
  • Avatar
    Catutus
    over 2 years ago
  • Avatar
    Kaydeemmm
    over 2 years ago
    I agree and I, too have suffered from similar insecurities. But I have learned that words can build you up or down, and people say or do things to other people because they hurt-not because of who you are. But when you hear something enough times, you are likely to believe it probably because it is the only thing you know. If you begin to replace a negative self-image with a positive and more realistic one, your attitude will begin to change! Practice makes perfect!
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