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Building Confidence

(7 replies)
User_6055

by theOlive

almost 3 years ago

Viewed 4073 times

A good number of guys and just people in general find me attractive, why I have no idea. I dont find myself as attractive as others do as a result of a major lack of self confidence and insecurities from childhood that carried into my adult life. How do I build up my self confidence to view myself as others do?
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    mgrace replied almost 3 years ago:
    Sit down and make a list of FIVE things you like about yourself, little or big....physical or non-physical. Ex: I like how straight my teeth are, or I like how I organized I am. Grow it from there. Its okay to feel a little selfish about yourself, and to look in the mirror and say, "ya i do friggin rock!"
  • Matthew
    Matthew D. Della Porta, Ph.D. Happiness Expert replied almost 3 years ago:
    It's common to struggle with self-esteem. An effective way to address this issue is through the use of positive affirmations. This involves saying statements that counteract any negative thinking that you normally do. Here are a few example affirmations, but feel free to come up with your own: 1) I am beautiful. 2) I am worthy of love. 3) I am grateful for my [choose any attractive feature that you have]. Even if you don't believe them, practice saying them. Write them down on index cards and post them somewhere where you'll see them. Say them out loud to yourself at least three times a week, with conviction. Fake it until you make it! :) This technique may seem silly at first but it's important to recognize that a lack of self-esteem is usually sustained by lots of negative thinking. These negative, self-defeating thoughts need to be countered with positive thoughts, which come from the positive affirmations. Good luck!
  • Profile_b192
    kaitlin07 replied over 2 years ago:
    It's the same for me. I've realized though that you just have to know you have perfections and imperfections just like everybody else, and embrace that.
  • User_152149
    cellomaster replied over 2 years ago:
    Hi!
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    queen556 replied over 2 years ago:
    GO WITH IT...YOU ARE NOT A KID ANYMORE...LOSE THE INSECURITIES (I KNOW EASIER SAID THAN DONE) BUT YOU WILL MISS A LOT IN LIFE WORRING ABOUT BEING INSECURE..I FOUND MYSELF SITTING HOME ALONE BECAUSE I COULDN'T FIND ANYONE TO DO THINGS WITH ME, THEN I THOUGHT, WHY AM I WAITING...NOW I GO EVERYWHERE I WANT TO GO, IF IT IS BY MYSELF SO BE IT, THERE ARE SO MANY PEOPLE OUT THERE TO MEET & TALK TO. YOU HAVE MEN THAT THINK YOU ARE ATTRACTIVE...RELISH IT.
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    Catutus replied over 2 years ago:
    :)
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    Kaydeemmm replied about 2 years ago:
    I agree and I, too have suffered from similar insecurities. But I have learned that words can build you up or down, and people say or do things to other people because they hurt-not because of who you are. But when you hear something enough times, you are likely to believe it probably because it is the only thing you know. If you begin to replace a negative self-image with a positive and more realistic one, your attitude will begin to change! Practice makes perfect!
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