editorNadia replied over 1 year ago:
You are totally right that the hardest part is starting over, and the biggest obstacle to doing that is letting go of all the pain and frustration from the breakup. Unfortunately, the breakup rarely ends with "it's over"--it can keep going through rumors, fights, and nasty comments from new girlfriends. But the best way to stop the cycle is counter-intuitive: Do something unexpected. If this new girl or your ex thinks you're going to be upset by their badmouthing, then just say, "You know what, I've moved on and I'm really happy for you. I hope we can get to a place where we get along." You're not being kind so they'll get off easy or think you're the bigger person--you're doing it for you. If you can diffuse the negativity, you'll be able to let go of that frustration and anger and truly move on with your life. Just kill 'em with kindness, as they say.