my relatioonship with my wife

by magnum91

over 1 year ago

Viewed 722 times

i dont know what to do.i cannt stand the way her family treat her and i am not supost to say anything.last year at this time she almost died on me and none of them even came to the hospital.in my mind they dont care only what she can do for them

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  ShyShadow22 replied over 1 year ago:

  Not an expert so this is pure opinion but i think this kind of situation is really controversial. I think that yes you shouldn't intervene unless asked by your wife but make sure you let her know your feelings on the subject before hand. Try to make sure she knows this effects you and that what happens is something you go through together. With my family we sit back for a while but if it gets out of control like with the way yours sounds to me i think taking action would be the best solution. At this point the only ones who will end up burned are you guys and it's NOT fair to your wife at all. But again this is all a matter of opinion and im not exactly one to hand out advice. but this is how i would handle the matter. Hope it helps in some way or another, sorry if it doesn't.

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  smile313 replied over 1 year ago:

  I understand your situation because I’ve seen it played out before and it has been a part of my life. You can’t welcome people like that in your life. These type of people are greedy and will never stop being cruel. It’s a horrible flaw that will always remain with them. Some don’t out grow bad and harmful behaviour. What you need to do is confront them, and then forget them, if they fail to change and can’t see nor accept and apologize for the harm caused. There are some people who hate confrontation but that’s because they hate what you have to say, and are scared to hear your opinion. Me on the other had love confrontation and love to hear what others have to say. But with this said there is a right and a wrong way to confrontation. If you’ve got a strong character like me, it’s important and essential that you don’t appear threatening because if you do so they will go into defence mode (they won’t admit to doing anything wrong) and you won’t be able to get the answers that you need. Secondly it’s a form of bulling and I think you need to speak out both to your wife on your concerns and to her family on your behalf and hers. Even if she doesn’t agree to it, I still think you should say how you feel. If they are making her life and yours miserable then those selfish and heartless people don’t need to be a part of her life. Sometimes the things you don’t say will eat and hurt you more than the things you did say. Be hopeful cause speaking out might just make a difference. Hope this helps :)

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  bettyliem replied over 1 year ago:

  Tell her to ditch them. Relationships are a two-way street.

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  dayhuahua replied about 1 year ago:

  you are probably right about that. but she has to learn that for herself. my husband's family is the same way. i used to say something when they were treating him bad, but he'd just get mad at me. so I'd just bite my tongue and kinda point it out when it's not in the heat of the moment. they will someday see it for them selves.

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  vanessahubbard replied 9 months ago:

  My family tryed hard to cause problems and stuff in my relationship when my parents were alive .my husband was very understanding of my wish not to leave my parents alone "totally"and rid them of my life ... we agreed it was best for me to limit contact with them as the way they treated me and us was hurting me and he wouldn't alow that! so I limited my calling them or see them except for major illness and concerned calling to once a month& holidays.

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