My boyfriend doesn't want me to masturbate...

(15 replies)

by vonbling

over 1 year ago

Viewed 6839 times

So I'm religious, so is my boyfriend.. but he's way more so than I am. He doesn't think masturbating is right, and I LOVE it. From ****** to Vibrators, and just my fingers, I adore it. I'm 19 and so is he. Since he found out.. he doesn't want me to do it anymore, and yes, this is childish, but we pinky swore over it. He's far away, in New York, and I'm California. So not being able to please myself when I see him every three months is VERY difficult.. I broke it three times since we made it and have no idea what to do. Should I talk to him about it even though it will hurt him and maybe make him feel disgusted with me? Or just keep it up secretly?

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DMM5 replied over 1 year ago:

At 19 it might be difficult to see that when someone tries to control an aspect of your life, they are not respecting you. You are not doing anything unhealthy or abnormal. Perhaps you should explore the possibility that he is hiding his personal insecurities behind a religious blanket. It is your body and YOU choose how to treat it!

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Shull87 replied over 1 year ago:

What religen are your guys and what scriptures makes it bad?

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kaya3737 replied over 1 year ago:

Masturbating is usually something done alone so I think this is one of those "What he doesn't know won't hurt him" issues. If he was in the same city at least it may be a different story but he's not so you have to keep yourself satisfied somehow right? I wouldn't make yourself crazy over it. It's not like you are doing anything illegal or harming anyone. This is something for you done by you and honestly that makes it no one else's business but your own.

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KING TIGGER replied about 1 year ago:

Keep it on wraps. I know I don't talk about masterbating with my partner. But masterbating with vibrators and big rubber ****** is so much fun i even masterbate at work on my breaks. It is so much fun.. Dont tell anybody.. And try masterbating everywhere. Church, the market, at the park, in your car, and its even better when someone catches you with a 18 incher in you;]

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KING TIGGER replied about 1 year ago:

Who cares its nobodys business but theirs. But I would guess one of those weird religions where they come and knock on the door right at dinner time. Wanting to suck the life out of you for there cult. OOOpps. Scientologists or Mormon would be my guess. WEIRD_O's. And yes Mormonism is a cult. They are some of the most repulsive people i have ever met. Remember Jim Jones? SAY NO TO CULTS. No matter what they promise you. Try a normal religion, like Lutheran. We dont have sex with multiple partners or beat our kids. And masterbating is allowed

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DaiDai33 replied about 1 year ago:

its not like ur cheating so he should understand and yall in a long distance relationship and yall seem faithful so why not play with urself to keep u satisfied

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beautiful lily replied about 1 year ago:

no. keeping things from him will not help the situation. maybe he should have a new experience . i know that you said he was religous and he doesnt agree with it but, hey if you like it you cant realy do anything about it. i personaly think u SHOULD talk to him.

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Mysterious Bre replied about 1 year ago:

RIGHT.

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chickenroo replied about 1 year ago:

Religion and their teachings on sex acts that are acceptable and not acceptable are ridiculous. I was raised as a Jehovah's Witness where masturbation was put right up there with murder. Anyways just had to throw that in. I would talk to him and explain to him what your feelings are on the matter. But I guarantee that a 19 year old male does NOT go 3 months without sex or masturbating himself.

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Jenichael replied 11 months ago:

I think it is a personal thing with yourself. Yes its nice to share if partner wants. But hey its like brushing your teeth, noone has to do it for you,you do it yourself, and you don't need permission. Its not something I do unless my partner wants or like foreplay. But if I did, thats mine!!!! I can do with it, what I WANT!!! Good luck and Happy Fingers.

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labgirl replied 11 months ago:

Find a new boyfriend who isn't a control freak.

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outdoor replied 9 months ago:

if he thinks masturbating is bad just imagine what he thinks about sex....dump him. Youll have shocking sex with him if you ever decide to marry....

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clsbabe replied 9 months ago:

Girlie

There are just some girl things that we just don't discuss we our guys but, we do them.Do you and keep it

moving and happy

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dumbass replied 8 months ago:

He has the problem, can not imagine him not wanting you too. My problem is the opposit I know my wife does it,and i think it's very erotic.. we have been together 28yr's.. caught her a few time's without her knowing, but if I ask her she tell's me she never does.. well let me ack up.... that was 1st ten yr's, the 2nd 10 she got to where she would tell me she did if i asked. now in last few yr's ,she has gone back to denying it and will not even talk about it , though again i know ( DON'T ASK HOW, YOU WOULDN'T LIKE ANSWER) she does and even more frequently. I tell her it's great if she does and have no problem with it. But now it's like a taboo thing. Anyway my point ,if there is one, he is missing out. If only i were so lucky....

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kikokomai replied 6 months ago:

You shouldn't need permission from anyone about whether or not you can satisfy your bodies needs. Did he promise you that he's not going to be masturbating? and if he didn't, why are you the one who has to repress thier sexual identity?

I think that repressing things like this only cause damage, it might not seem like a problem now, but if you continue letting him dictate your body and personal sex life it could really turn into a problem. I had a problem similar to this before, but with my ex-boyfriend it wasn't a deal of religion. He was so parinoid and possessive that he didnt' even want me touching my own body.

Anyways, so I think that you should satisfy yourself, but I don't think that you should keep it a secret from him. Why? Well, you shouldn't feel like you have to, actually. And if you keep it a secret then you might feel like you have to be keeping secrets about other things that you really don't need to. Sex is a part of life, it's needed to populate the planet, and physical intimacy is something that I think plays a huge roll in a couple's relationship. I think that you should talk to him and adress the problem, because it soiunds like it's something that needs to be discussed. Not talking about it could cause all sorts of things to go wrong in a relationship. So just approach it like an adult, and hope he understands.

No woman should feel like they need to hide themselves and repress their sexual identity. Do it to your hearts content, and I hope that everything works out for you :)

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