Sexual chemistry is an intricate part of the already complex system we call relationships. There are different types of sexual chemistry—the kind that hits us like a strong breeze on a windy day and the kind that washes over us softly and slowly like a wave across the sand. Neither type of sexual chemistry origin story is better or worse, just different. However, with the latter example, you might feel you need to help things along or continue to fan the flame.
Sometimes, you might be in a relationship with waning sexual attraction or have found someone you are perfectly compatible with but feel a lack in the sexual chemistry sphere. Whatever your reasons, it’s possible to cultivate sexual chemistry in a relationship. Here’s how:
- Have patience. The number one most important rule for cultivated sexual chemistry is to give it time. If you aren’t experiencing the immediate and intense variety, that means you’re on a path that’s a slow burn. Spend more time with the person and continue getting to know them better—this is what will ultimately create the chemistry.
- Trust. One of the most vital aspects of any relationship is trust. If you don’t trust the person, you won’t be able to be open with them, and without openness, no intimacy can develop. For genuine sexual chemistry to grow, you’ll both have to become more trusting of each other. However, this is something that must happen organically and can’t be rushed. Instead, let this be your queue to check in with any unnecessary pressure you’re putting on yourself or the situation to have a particular outcome. Nothing kills passion like unwanted pressure.
- Learn about yourself. To cultivate sexual chemistry, you must know enough about yourself to know what you want in a sexual relationship. There won’t be any chemistry to develop if you don’t know what you wish to cultivate. Spend some time imagining what makes you happy in a sexual relationship and see how that can apply to creating sexual chemistry with your partner. This is also an excellent opportunity for building intimacy by sharing this information.
Sexual chemistry is an integral part of any happy relationship and shouldn’t be neglected. However, there are different ways to experience that chemistry, whether intense and sudden or in a gradual building way. For the latter, these relationship tips will help you create the sexual chemistry of your dreams like a museum curator choose art for a gallery.