Anal sex is clearly not everyone’s cup of tea, and there’s nothing wrong with you if you don’t want to add it to your sexual repertoire. But for couples who are mutually interested in trying it, your first time anal experience does not have to be painful. If you’re curious about experimenting with anal sex, here are some things to keep in mind the first time—or any time—you try it:More: Study Reveals Shocking Attitudes Toward Anal SexStart slowly. Immediately starting with penetration or fast thrusting is painful. You need to work your way up to that (if you so desire). Instead, go slowly, experimenting either with your partner’s finger or a small sex toy before attempting penetration. “Experimenting after you’ve already climaxed can make you feel more relaxed and open to sensations,” says Annette Gates, a sexologist based in New York City.Use lubrication. It’s a must. Your anus doesn’t produce enough lubrication for comfortable sex, like your vagina does, so using lube liberally—and reapplying when needed—reduces friction and makes penetration easier.Find a comfortable position. Rather than going for classic doggie style first, try spooning side by side with your partner and have your partner enter you from behind. The spooning position gives you greater control of the angle and depth of penetration, explains Vanessa Marin, a San Francisco-based sex therapist, which helps make anal sex more comfortable.Clear communication with your partner is key. That means letting your partner know right away if something hurts or is unpleasant or if you need to change the pace or stop altogether. Any partner who respects and cares for you will listen. Period.Real Women Talk: Is Anal Sex Really Enjoyable?