You’ve likely heard the saying, sticks and stones may break your bones, but words can never hurt you. Well, part of that saying is true, but the other half isn’t. Not only can words hurt, they can actually kill…your relationship that is. And here’s why.
Over time, as relationships get older, we tend to forget how damaging words can be. We may go from caring and considerate of every word we say to “letting them have it” when we’re pissed off.
An occasional argument is normal. Everyone has disagreements. But, when arguments become frequent and hostile, the love that was once there will eventually result in the end of the relationship.
According to Dr. Randi Gunther, “Physical scar tissue loses its elasticity and its flexibility. Emotional scar tissue is painfully similar.” This means that over time the emotional damage is strong enough to turn your lover into your worst enemy.
Here are 4 phrases you want to refrain from using when talking to your partner:
“You’re always lying. I can’t believe anything you say.” – Calling someone a liar and then telling them that nothing they say can be believed is a major blow to their character.
“Whatever. You never make any sense.” – Telling someone that they don’t make any sense, makes them feel invalid and inferior.
“You don’t know what you’re talking about.”- Has anyone ever told you that you don’t know what you’re talking about? Very insulting, isn’t it?
“You’re always f***ing up.” – Telling your partner something like this is a major blow to their confidence and self-worth.
Although these phrases should be avoided if you want to get back to a heathy relationship, anything similar to these should be off limits as well. Remember, you were once crazy about that person. Treat them with respect and if you find that it feels nearly impossible to do (for whatever reason), then maybe it’s just time to walk away.