Most couples will face some issues in their relationships that are to do with their sex life or sex drive, especially if both of your sex drives are entirely out of sync. If one of you has a stronger desire for sexual activity in the relationship or marriage, then you can often constantly push for more sex, or taking your partner’s lack of interest in having sex with you personally.
Some people also look outside of the relationship for ways to fulfill their sexual needs, which can, of course, have negative implications for them and their partner. If you both have totally different libidos, then this can be difficult to deal with, but there are some things you can try to tackle the problem.
Timing is Important
Often, couples admit that tiredness during the working week can prevent them from wanting to have sex. Sometimes you may just feel like winding down and getting an early night after a long day in the office. To deal with this, try to focus your time and attention on the weekends – or whenever you both have time off work with no distractions or excuses. This way, you can compromise and work out when is a good time for you both where you’re less likely to be tired.
Introduce New Things
If fatigue or the physical demands of sex are stopping you from wanting it regularly or enjoying it as much, then try to introduce new and exciting things into the bedroom. Sex toys are great for having fun while taking away some physical strain without compromising intimacy.
Don’t Rule Out Masturbation
Sometimes, you have sexual needs that must be met. If your partner’s libido is lower than yours, then suggest masturbation, which in some way involves them, without them having to meet your level of sexual activity. For example, ask if they can be intimate with you in different ways such as stroking your hair and skin and whispering in your ear while you masturbate, or vice versa, depending on who has the higher sex drive. This is a great way to still get what you want without feeling ‘selfish’ or as if you are pressuring your partner into having sex when they aren’t feeling up to it.