The Biology of Love

True love isn’t just a feeling—it’s a science, too! We’ll explain the physical and biological changes that make love a chemical romance.

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This increase in oxytocin (and the entire symphony of brain chemicals that influence love) is a key reason why 99 percent of humans live in pair bonds. We’re not just talking about marriage, but any intimate relationship with a strong partner, including a significant other, parent, sibling, close friend or pet. (Women desire this community feeling more than men.)

From a survival standpoint, it’s important to live in communities—hence the evolution of these biochemicals.

MORE: Introducing the Rules of Attraction

Nonetheless, after about four years of a relationship, the chemical tirade that keeps us together starts to recede. This timing isn’t a coincidence. At this point, any potential offspring wouldn’t be entirely dependent on the mother. This leaves her better able to provide for herself and children.

Fathers are more prone to leave without these chemical handcuffs. This is why relationships need to move from pure romance to a deeper level of connection, so you can create a fertile field for lifelong pair-bonding.

 

 

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