Sometimes, the hardest thing we have to learn is to forgive and forget. We’ve all been wronged by someone before, and we’ve all wronged someone before. And we all know how painful it is waiting for the person you wronged to forgive you. But, forgiveness is hard. For some people, they forgive right away because of the fear of losing that person hurts more than whatever they did to you. But for other people, forgiveness is something that has to be earned. And earning that can take weeks, months, even years. Regardless- unless if what the person did to you is entirely unforgivable- you have to learn how to forgive and forget.

In life, we love multiple people. We love our parents, our family pet. We love our siblings and our best friends. And we’ll love someone else in an entirely different way, in a romantic way. Regardless of who or how you love, people make mistakes. And at some point in your life, even if you can’t imagine it ever happening, one of those people is going to make a mistake that will put your love at stake.

Maybe they told someone a secret they promised they would never tell. Perhaps they lied to you. Regardless of what the situation is, being wronged is painful. And even if you’re someone who can forgive right away, that pain is not just going to disappear. If someone has continuously caused you pain, it might be time to reassess your relationship with them. But, if you genuinely believe that your life wouldn’t be the same without that person in it, you have to learn to forgive and forget.

Forgiving is one thing, but forgetting is another. You can put on a smile, wipe away your tears, and say the words “I forgive you” easily. Whether you mean it or not, telling someone you forgive them is just a few words. Forgetting, however, that’s a whole different thing. Forgetting that someone wronged you is something you have to deal with internally. You have to ignore the pain they caused, realize their importance to you, and move past it. And that can be difficult. And you might never entirely forget it- but if you love that person, you have to let the memory fade.

In life, being hurt is inevitable. There is no single relationship that has never endured pain, but there is a reason why people fight and make up. So, next time you find yourself hurt over something someone you love did to you, think about their importance in your life. Think about all the times you’ve wronged someone you loved and how you begged for their forgiveness. And if you can’t imagine a life without them in it, then you have to learn to forgive and forget.